It's Tuesday so it must be American Idol

I'm not sure if I have any readers left or not. American Idol is an acquired taste. I know, because I thought it was the stupidest show the first two years. Well, I've let my Tivo run so I can fast forward past the commercials. So let's see what's happening!!

Well, it's a two hour show so we will have lots of filler! First we have the big introduction montage to tell us why we are watching this show. Like we needed reminding! They left out Gaiken!! My mother in law won't like that one bit. She LOVES him. I don't know why. Then again, my husband doesn't understand my obsession with Elliott Yamin so fair is fair.

The band is bigger...and the stage...and the audience! It's the big time folks! Jordin always wears clothes I love. She is so cute!

It's Michael Jackson night! No! Wait! It's Diana Ross night. I can tell because she's still black and Michael is not! It's an easy mistake to make! Her hair is HUGE! She doesn't look that bad but I'm glad I don't have HDTV. Isn't the nice, she hugged them all! I like her!

Brandon is first in the dead man's spot so I predict he will be going home first. I think he's more suited to the background. It least he's got a good day job. He's singing "Can't Hurry Love." He looks like he would prefer to be shot! I feel sorry for him. First up is BAD and so was that note! It's looking pretty bad for Brandon. The hips aren't going to help you when you FORGET THE WORDS! He is gone! Let's see what the judges say. Randy says he's a background singer again. Paula says a lot about nerves and doesn't want to tell him anything bad. Simon says it was a big let down, no star quality. I have to agree.

Who's going to be in line for the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle movie? No one? Come on! You've got to love "Turtle on the Half Shell" no, wait, it's Oysters on the half shell that I like!

Melinda's up next and she's with Ryan on the tiny high chairs. Never noticed her boobs were THAT big. Oh No He Didn't!! Ryan asked Simon if he had any advice for Melinda with her high heels and Simon told him that he should know. Ryan yelled "Stay out of my closet!" Simon said simply, "Come out." Ryan said, "This is about the top 12 not your wishes." THAT was the best! They embarrassed Melinda with that one!

I can't get over Diana's hair! Did I mention it was huge? Melinda gave Diana goose bumps. She is singing "Home." She is VERY good. Too bad I don't listen to singers like her normally. I'd have my idol! Unless something major happens, she is the next American Idol. She can work a stage. Paula is in tears and Simon is laughing at Paula. The judges love her. I agree but I won't be voting for her. I got to save my votes for my favorites that need them. She is very nice and cute (except for the no neck thing). I reserve my right to vote for her later in the contest.

Chris Sligh is next. He and Diana are trading hair care tips! Too funny! I don't think Diana liked him messing with her song. No glasses tonight. Oh boy! I think I'm with Diana on the arrangement. Me no likey. It's growing on me but not that much. The boy can sing. He has great tone. The judges don't like it over all and it's the arrangement that's bad. He still has my vote this week.

Gina's next. I wonder what she's going to sing?

I really like that Cingular commercial with the minutes in the garbage. The mom pulls it off perfectly. She sounds just like my mom.

Ryan is in the audience. So far, Melinda is getting more face time than the rest of the contestants.

Gina is singing one of my favorites, "Love Child." Diana warned her about annunciation but she didn't take it all the heart. I still like her. Randy calls it pitchy and boring. Paula calls the song a "feel good" song. I don't think so! Simon says it wasn't terrible but not fantastic. I'll vote for her!

That new show drive looks good. I'll be watching. I like that guy that was in Firefly whatever his name is. I should know his name since I love all things Joss but I don't.

Oh my Lord! Sanjaya got in a fight with a curling iron, lost, and is rocking the Breck Girl look! Go curling iron! He's singing "Ain't no Mountain High Enough." PLEASE! DON'T VOTE FOR HIM! He needs to go home. He's wearing hoop earrings too...in both ears! The judges are at a loss for words. The stylists went to town on him! Randy finally says that it was bad but the hair was good. Paula tells him that he is sweet. Simon says that Diana would have hated that and tells him that he is very brave. Now Sanjaya is at a loss for words.

Haley is getting some extra face time too! How about that!?! I think she's wearing Mark earrings!! Go Avon! Haley is singing "Missing You." She forgot the words...a lot. Oh well! She is in danger too. I was thinking about voting for her but it was boring and I didn't like it. I don't think the judges will either. I think she's going to cry. The judges don't like it, I was right. Paula tells her she looks nice, KOD (Kiss of Death). Simon says he didn't think it was that bad and he remembered her name. Simon is pimping her and just might have me voting for her now! I feel really bad for her. Okay! She got me. I'm voting for her! Let me adjust my DialIdol during the commercials.

Must see Blades of Glory!!! Boobs Magillacutty is selling bras! Perfect!

Scary Phil is singing "I'm going to make you Love me." He seems to have started this one better than most of his song but that's not saying much. Don't vote for him either. He needs to go home a help take care of his kids. The audience seems to like it and Randy says that his vocals were good. Paula parrots what Randy says and adds that it should have been more up tempo. Simon says it was okay but shouty. I didn't like it.

More commercials. I'm almost up to real time now!

LaKisha is up and is singing "God Bless the Child." What the hell was that! She did some weird voice thing that was really weird and not easily described. She is playing catch up with Melinda and is not pulling it off. I'm sure that judges will like it because they always like her but I didn't. She was very nervous and it showed. And the judges rave.

More damn commercials! And I'm up to real time. Crap! Now what?

That was painful!

Blake is getting more face time. He is singing "Keep Me Hanging On." In the clip, he's arrangement sounds great! Could do without the dancing. He reminds me of Sting. I like Sting. The arrangement sounded better in the clips. I think it's all the extra instruments. He should have stuck to just the piano. I don't like it. I like Blake but I'm on the fence about voting for him. Randy is talking too much to have liked it. He's going on and on. Paula agrees but then says that he could have a hit with that. ??? Simon didn't get it and I have to agree with him.

More commercials. I guess I'll spell check.

Stephanie is singing "Love Hangover." She doing very well but I think she will be splitting the Diva vote with Melinda and LaKisha who will take the biggest shares. For that fact alone, she could be going home if Brandon doesn't. Randy says that she forgot some of the words but I didn't notice. Paula didn't like the arrangement and neither did Simon. She's cute and that will get her some votes.

Chris is singing "The Boss." Don't think I know that one. He sings too fast for me. He walk on stage was awkward. To many runs for me. Okay! Let's just get it out there. I don't like him. I think he's trying to be like Elliott and failing. The finger shake at the camera was bad. He went into the audience and now he sounds out of breath. It's a bad song. Maybe it was better when Diana sang it. Randy is half and half. Paula thinks he nailed the blend between today and yesterday (I'm translating that for her). Simon hated it! I like Simon!!!

Jordin's in the pimp spot...after the commercials!!!!!!!!

Jordin is singing "If We Hold On Together." I don't think I know this one either. I think this is a great song for her since it's from a Cartoon movie. It's young like her. I'm voting for her. So that's Chris S., Gina, Haley, and Jordin getting my votes tonight! Randy really liked it and so did Paula. Simon thought it was very good! Awesome!!

Well, Sanjaya was the worst but I don't think he will go home tomorrow. Vote for the Worst has got to be happy with his performance. I think Howard Stern is going to vote with them tonight. The one's going home this week and next will not be on tour with the rest so I'm hoping that Sanjaya will go either this week or next but I don't think that's going to happen. I think it's going to be Blake or Stephanie because Haley is going to get the pity vote (she's getting mine).

Until next time!!